In The Beginning…
Fat Penguin.
It’s an ice breaker.
*shudders at own bad humour*
It occurred to me the other day that I appear to hold the franchise. Spike1790. I seem to be the only one. This surprises me. I don’t even remember how I got the name, so it seems ironic that I should be the only one. Someone told me that Spike1790 shouldn’t just exist without a personality as a series of pages on myspace or facebook or last-fm. So here goes. Let’s give Spike a personality.
Ok, I’m currently 18, and doing A-Levels at Tring School. I study Sociology, English Language and Literature, and Philosophy and Ethics. I’m dating a genius called Rob Valkass, who goes to the University of Exeter, and who is actually younger than me… *rolls eyes* . I don’t really have any hobbies, just a list of things I would like to do at some point: rock climbing, archery, competitive alcoholism…etc.
Dreams, hopes and ambitions… I’m sure I’ve got some of those…
Umm…
I wanna be rock star?
No.
Umm… I want to teach the world to sing?
Definitely not…
I want to break free…?
Ok, enough of song lyrics. I want to go to Africa. That’s what I want most in the world. I don’t really see myself as being the type to get married and have a massive wedding, with a big white dress and lots of bridesmaids strewn around like Christmas wrapping paper. And I don’t think I would be a great parent, so I think I’ll skip the whole having kids thing. I was going to take a gap year to Africa and work with lions, rehabilitating them into the wild. It would have been a once in a life time experience, but with a price tag of £900 for two weeks plus flights, etc, that got forgotten fairly quickly. So I will be settling for a dream holiday to… the fabulous Southend. Wow. Can’t wait. (Sarcasm is hard to convey in writing… :s)
Some more
I like music- listening not playing. I have no musical talent what-so-ever, as many people will verify. So I might stand a chance of winning the X-factor, Pop Idol, Britain’s Got Talent or similar… I have a rather eclectic taste in music, as my CD collection includes Marilyn Manson, Godsmack, Static x, Cream, Plain White T’s, Nirvana, Eminem, Kanye West and the Vengaboys (no, I’m not proud of that fact, and believe me when I say it wouldn’t have happened if there hadn’t been copious amounts of alcohol involved).
I plan at some point on getting a pet, possibly a kitten or goldfish or something, and giving it a really stupid name, like Mr Snuggles, or Giggles, or Bum. I just think it would be really funny to hear someone say “Here, Bum! There’s a good boy! Fetch! Fetch, Bum!” in that annoying high pitched tone that people only use when talking to animals or babies that are too young to understand words.
Ok, that’s enough of a personality for the time being. Let’s build up a word picture of what I actually look like… 5’6(or 7)”, blonde hair, ugly as sin, fat, no fashion sense. (picture possibly to follow at some point) And for the record, yes, I am female/ girl/ woman, and I’m fed up of people saying “Wot? Yoo gay or sumfink?” when I say I’ve got a boyfriend. Now that’s out the way, we can talk about something far more interesting.
Some context.
We’re in that annoying time now that is nowhere really in particular. Christmas and New Year are over, and Valentine’s and Easter aren’t quite here, no matter what the shops seem to think. It is not necessary to start selling Easter eggs before Christmas. The January exams are finished and all over the country school kids are eagerly awaiting (read: trying to forget about ) the arrival of those envelopes with pieces of paper in that decide our fates and decide who will be doomed to repeat history in summer school.
For the record, Valentines Day is on a Saturday this year. So for all those people who are going to be spending the day with the person they love, Happy Valentines. To all the people who will be spending it alone, in front of the TV, with a microwaved curry, Happy Saturday. Suffice to say, I will not be joining the microwaved-curry-squad this year. Oh no. I will instead be ordering in Chinese or Pizza. 
There’s way too much hype about Valentines day in my opinion. It’s the one day of the year that you can buy a cheap, tacky stuffed toy and present it to your boyfriend or girlfriend and they will have to look grateful for it, even though they have just presented you with a box of very expensive chocolates/ a puppy/ a bugatti veyron, and they want to rip out your guts and make you wear them as a hat. I’m not a cynic; I just don’t like all that mushy romantic crap.
Edit (25/03/09): as mentioned earlier in this post, i have now found a photo and am almost unwilling to post it
cz i don’t want to make you go blind…
This one is much better :)